Adventure the First: Here’s Lookin’ at You, Kid
This dude makes me want to have a dinner party, because the idea of serving guests an entrée that stares them down is highly amusing to me.
Adventure the Second: My Two Cents, Literally
Dear Whole Foods:
Two cents off does not a last chance clearance price make. I would humbly suggest that everyone who enters your store donate the two cents saved on that LAST CHANCE! clearance sale to hire a math tutor for whoever does your pricing.
Adventure the Third: Coconuts for You
If you’ve ever seen this Coco Libre sparkling organic coconut water from concentrate and thought, “wow, that sounds disgusting,” you would be correct. Not possessing your power of clairvoyance, I can tell you that this particular product tastes as though a lemon had sex with a coconut, then they stuck the used condom in a can and poured some fizzy water over it.
Final Score:
You – 1
Me – 0
Whole Foods – negative 2, because that two cents off thing is really inexcusable
Loser: The red snapper, because at least the rest of us are alive and not about to served up at someone’s dinner party.